Wednesday, April 13, 2016

She's home

Gordon was home sick today and spent most of two hours crying and pleading for mommy to come home.

Then she did. And he immediately fell asleep in her arms.


This is the moment she's waited nearly three months for. 

She has a lot of healing left to do, but this is a big day. 

Tuesday, April 12, 2016

Homeward bound, we hope!

Sorry for the big gap between updates, but I think there's good news to report. If all goes well, Amanda could be coming home .... tomorrow!

It's been nearly three weeks, I think, since Amanda's second colostomy surgery. They did a transverse loop colostomy on the other side of her abdomen. She came out of it with a whole bunch of retention sutures bringing the wound together. It's a mess in there, that's for sure, but this one looks like a keeper.

Crossing a footbridge over fast-flowing water can be intimidating but exhilarating. "I want mama home."

The first few days after surgery were rough. Amanda was pretty well out of it, either in a lot of pain or so drugged up that she couldn't stay awake. There's that fine line between "relief of pain" and "you've stopped breathing."

Once she got through that, there was more pain -- the site of the stoma (new hole where the intestine is revealed) is right about where she had the chemo burn a couple of years ago. (They tried a chemotherapy technique where the chemicals are injected through a port into the abdominal cavity so it can get right at the cancer cells, but the needle came up short and shot the juice into her fatty tissue. An internal chemical burn. Yowwwww. Now it's re-triggered.)

She's also had some infection issues. She has a tunneling wound or sinus tract. It's an infection that's creating a cave inside her tissue, and those are tough to treat. It was really yucky and is still not solved.

The docs and nurses say her major surgical wounds are healing nicely, but that's all relative. At first glance, she still looks all sliced up with open wounds going here and there. Kind of a Frankenstein's belly of gaps and closures and flesh going here and there. But it's getting better.

She was on TPN (total nutrition by IV) for a good long time, but is back to eating and drinking like a human again. That, plus the fact that the new colostomy is rerouting the poop flow OUT of her body instead of into her gut, is probably making for better healing.

Things aren't perfect or ideal yet. The sticky flange that the colostomy bag sticks to has been prone to leaking -- it's not supposed to. Her wounds are still open and need frequent re-packing.

But she's determined to GET HOME and the doctors are behind her GOING HOME. Gordon wants her home. I want her home. It ain't gonna be easy, but it's time! Could happen as soon as tomorrow.

So, what have we been up to over the past few weeks?

Amanda has been filling the doors of her hospital room with pages she's finished from her adult coloring books:


About half of the mandalas Amanda has been coloring.

Gordon celebrated his third birthday with mommy and I in the quiet room on the gyne surgery floor, down the hall from Amanda's hospital room. Cupcakes and presents, then I took G to Adventures On Wonderland for an afternoon of play! (Thanks to everyone for all of Gordon's amazing birthday presents, by the way!)

Mommy put on a brave face to show Gordon a fun time as he turned 3.
And, with the help of my always-supportive and uber-helpful in-laws, I've been able to get out a couple of times. I got photo credentials to shoot Walk Off The Earth and Marianas Trench at Budweiser Gardens (Flickr Album):

Walk Off The Earth performs in London. Photo credit: Holy crap, I took this.
And went with a work buddy to a wrestling show last weekend and snapped a few hundred pics (Smash Wrestling Flickr album):

Always happy to be ringside once again. Tyler Tirva dropkicks Cody Deaner, brother.
After nearly three months of holding down the homestead while Amanda's been in hospital, visiting nearly every day, and keeping things rolling at work I confess -- I'm pretty worn out. I think we all are. It's been a real grind for so many people who've been working behind the scenes to keep life going. But it looks like things are taking a turn for the better.

I hope to have another update soon once Amanda's home and getting used to our house once again. I think she's going to appreciate the place a little bit more, after having spent almost a quarter of the year in bed in a small room!

The way out
Is the way in
The way out
Is the way in…

Out of touch
With the weather and the wind direction
With the sunrise
And the phases of the moon
Out of touch
With life in the land of the loving
With the living night
And the darkness at high noon

You can never break the chain
There is never love without pain
A gentle hand, a secret touch on the heart

Out of sync
With the rhythm of my own reactions
With the things that last
And the things that come apart
Out of sync
With love in the land of the living
A gentle hand, a secret touch on the heart

A healing hand, a secret touch on the heart

There is never love without pain
Life is a power that remains
- Rush, "Secret Touch"