Local fat radio guy tired of being fat
HALIFAX (BAS) -- Sources close to local fat radio guy Scott Simpson say he's grown tired of being fat.
"He seems to get this way every once in a while," says a friend. "He eats those cinnamon buns for months, drinks his energy drinks and chocolate milk, then suddenly one day decides he's too fat."
A sales rep from Nubody's gym at Halifax's Scotia Square confirms that Simpson paid for a year's membership this spring but has yet to walk through the door even once to break a sweat.
Simpson made several weak attempts to get into shape in years past. One effort in the late 1990s earned him an award from the Radio & Television News Directors' association. Nearly ten years later, Simpson auditioned for the documentary series X-Weighted in an effort to turn his newfound maturity into physical action. The show moved production to other cities in Canada, leaving Simpson to attempt fitness on his own again. Despite signs of progress, the effort was ultimately unsuccessful.
"Now he's saying he's too poor to afford smoking," says an unnamed coworker of the fat news anchor. "He loaded up his online banking and kept muttering about not having enough to buy cigarettes any more. Frankly, all this money sh*t is getting pretty tiresome. I almost wish he'd go back to ranting about Scientology."
Friends say Simpson, whose weight has drifted between 185 pounds and more than 230 pounds in the past decade, has spent most of his adult life in the 220 pound range.
Health Canada reports his current Body Mass Index is 36, considered Obese Class II, indicating a very high risk of health problems related to weight. The only recent bright spot on his health record is a blood pressure reading from a local visit with a new family doctor: 128/84.
Sources suggest the time may be coming soon for the fat radio guy to take action.
"When other people have problems, he jumps in like he knows what's best for everyone," says one confidante. "But when it comes to his own flaws, he talks a big game, plans everything to death, and ends up getting nothing done. He's got two excuses for every one good idea he comes up with. He's his own worst enemy with this stuff.
"If you ask me, he's going to have to give up all the fancy talk, start eating his own cooking, and just get his big ass in gear and take care of business. I sure hope so, 'cuz all his complaining about being fat, broke and out of breath is really getting on everyone's nerves."
"Yeah, and he frickin' reeks of cigarette smoke all the time," added another source. "Just gross. 'Nuff said."
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